Qui tangit frangatur.

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A round peg in a world of square holes...

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Oh, Mrs Dalloway, always giving parties... to cover the silence

Tell me a story. Tell me a story from your day.... Oh, fresh, was it? Like a... like a morning on the beach? Like that? Like that morning... when you walked out of that old house; you were eighteen, maybe I was nineteen.

I was nineteen years old... and I'd never seen anything so beautiful: you, coming out of the glass door in the early morning still sleepy. Isn't it strange? 'The most ordinary morning in anybody's life.

I'm afraid I can't make it to the party, Claris.
You've been so good to me, Mrs Dalloway.

I don't think two people could have been happier than we've been.

For MS Word abusers

The The Impotence of Proofreading

Has this ever happened to you?
You work very, very horde on a paper for English clash,
And still get a very glow raid on it (like a D or even a D=);
and all because you are the liverwurst spoiler in the whale wide word.
Yes! Proofreading your peppers is a matter of the the utmost impotence.

Now, this is a problem that affects manly, manly students all oval the word.
I, myself was such a bed spiller once upon a term
that my English torturer in my sophomoric year,
Mrs. Myth, she said I would never get into a good colleague.
And that's all I wanted, that's all any kid wanted at that age:
Just to get into a good colleague!
And not just anal community colleague either,
because I am not the kind of guy who would be happy at just anal community colleague!
I need to be challenged, challenged menstrually.
I needed a place that can offer me intellectual simulation.
So I know this properly makes me sound like a stereo but I really felt I could get into an ivory legal colleague.
So if I did not improvement, then gone would be my dream of going to Harvard, Jale, or Prison (you know, in Prison, New Jersey).

So, I got myself a spell checker
and I figured I was on Sleazy Street.

But there are several missed aches
that a spell chukker can't can't catch catch.
For instant, if you accidentally leave out word
your spell chequer won't put it in you.
And God for billing purposes only
you should have serial problems with Tori Spelling
your spell Chekhov may end up using a word that
you had absolutely no detention of using.
Because, I mean, what do you want it to douche, you know?
No! It only does what you tell it to douche.
You're the one who is sitting in front of the computer scream with your hand on the mouth going, clit, clit, clit.
'Just goes to show you how embargo
one careless little clit of the mouth can be.

Which reminds me of this one time during my Junior Mint.
The teacher took the paper that I have written on A Sale of Two Titties.
(No, I'm serial! I am serial!)
She read it out loud in front of all of my assmates.
It was quite possibly one of the most humidifying experiences I've ever had, being laughed at like that pubicly.

So, do yourself a flavor and follow these two pisces of advice:
One: There is no prostitute for careful editing of your own work.
No prostitute whatsoever.
And three: When it comes to proofreading,
the red penis your friend.

Spank you!

(Taylor Mali)

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Blog flowers, blog graphs

This an applet that turns your blog into a graph. The following images are visualizations of 2 of my blogs. Click on the links to watch how the graphs form. It's interesting to observe how the blogs have grown and changed over the past 37 months.


black:  the HTML tag, the root node
blue:  for links (the A tag)
red:  for tables (TABLE, TR and TD tags)
green:  for the DIV tag
violet:  for images (the IMG tag)
yellow:  for forms (FORM, INPUT, TEXTAREA, SELECT and OPTION tags)
orange:  for linebreaks and blockquotes (BR, P, and BLOCKQUOTE tags)
gray:  all other tags

       Sandbox in September 28, 2006.

       Sandbox in October 27, 2009.
       See it in action.

       Pedal Damn It in September 28, 2006.

       Pedal Damn It in October 27, 2009.
       See it in action.

To create a graph of your own blog, go here.

Made by Marcel Salathe (salathe.marcel AT gmail DOT com).

More about the creator of this HTML Graph Applet.


Monday, October 26, 2009

RTFL, cousin of RTFM

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Ammo Porn

Wednesday, October 07, 2009

Form for Feelies

From a friend serving in a real military. (You know? The sort that has taken part, takes part, and will continue to take part in real armed conflict?)

Meanwhile, it has been almost a year, and news of a certain wayang / poseur army's overseas training camp — with a name that begins with the same letter as "wimp" and rhymes with "crybaby" — having burnt down in Australia still hasn't appeared on the newspapers of the world's 144th ranked country for press freedom.

But... but... we feel like a real military!

Saturday, October 03, 2009

Diving in a flooded meadow

The "Grüner See" (engl. Green Lake) is situated in upper styria, Austria (see geotag). It is amazingly beautiful because of its deep green/blue colour and the surrounding alpine scenery. The lake itself dries up in autumn but fills up with melting water. The water itself of the lake is extremely pure, like glass. The colour is a result of light refraction.

"The night before there seemed to be heavy rain and too much of the pollen were flushed in the water and were floating. So the visibility could be much better, i´ve missed the „crystal clear water. You have to know the Green Lake is famous for its clear water. The good thing for this day was the water level with 9,40m. Spring flowers, plants, benches, hiking trails were below the surface. And i have found out when its the best time during the two to three months "flood" to get in the water - i was to early in this season. Altough the water temperature was between 5 and 6 degrees Celcius i did two dives (85 and 96 minutes long)

My face was well frozen, i can hardly speak afterwards. I hoped this procedure kept my face young and skintight. After watching the footage it seemed to be different."

This reminds me of diving in Hindhede Quarry in the mid 1990s, and sitting in a shed 70 feet under the surface of the water. There were trees, machinery, and vehicles in the clear, bluish waters (and even a large fresh water turtle too). After the dives, we would hurl ourselves off the 3, 4, 5-storey high cliffs in our wetsuits, before lugging the tanks up the long gravel road back to the parking lot. It all came to an end when a fellow diver's friend, a blabber-mouth New Paper reporter hack, tagged along; reneged on her promise to maintain secrecy; subsequently published an alarmist article in the papers the following week; resulting in the activity permanently banned in the locale by NParks.

New blog avatar

         New blog avatar.

         Fitting, isn't it?